Wednesday, November 4, 2009
this gonna be another emo post i guess.
had a row wif my mum. although dad didn't like say much.But i kinda could tell he wasn't happy though. Yes, i know tt she's worried bout my grades and all,cos i kinda wasn't doin tt well in poly as compared to my sec sch.
Each sem,i would tell myself that i must do my best cos i dun wan to forward any modules, and i can't afford to. Sometimes i wondered was it my temperament-melancholic, makes me so negative,pessimistic and gave myself lots of pressure. Or was it cos of the way i was brought up? All i knew was there was like inevitably a stress for me to graduate asap and support the family, so that bro can go uni and all that. Or was it that i'm not smart and somehow ended up in a super demanding course, and it kinda made me feel terribly stupid as compared to sec sch? There's no way i stand a chance of getting into local uni i guess..even if i can make it to uni,the dream of getting a local uni degree seems kinda real far to me.
All i knew was that after i graduate, i either have to work a few years den study,if not i have to study and work at the same time. if not,get a specialist diploma or advanced diploma or wad..Seriously, i never had thoughts of going to australia or anywhere else for further studies. Its a dream,that so far away,and it never gonna come true.
Apologies for being so emo today.
i kinda need something to make me smile.
My life had been rather rocky since the start of this year.
had a row wif my mum. although dad didn't like say much.But i kinda could tell he wasn't happy though. Yes, i know tt she's worried bout my grades and all,cos i kinda wasn't doin tt well in poly as compared to my sec sch.
Each sem,i would tell myself that i must do my best cos i dun wan to forward any modules, and i can't afford to. Sometimes i wondered was it my temperament-melancholic, makes me so negative,pessimistic and gave myself lots of pressure. Or was it cos of the way i was brought up? All i knew was there was like inevitably a stress for me to graduate asap and support the family, so that bro can go uni and all that. Or was it that i'm not smart and somehow ended up in a super demanding course, and it kinda made me feel terribly stupid as compared to sec sch? There's no way i stand a chance of getting into local uni i guess..even if i can make it to uni,the dream of getting a local uni degree seems kinda real far to me.
All i knew was that after i graduate, i either have to work a few years den study,if not i have to study and work at the same time. if not,get a specialist diploma or advanced diploma or wad..Seriously, i never had thoughts of going to australia or anywhere else for further studies. Its a dream,that so far away,and it never gonna come true.
Apologies for being so emo today.
i kinda need something to make me smile.
My life had been rather rocky since the start of this year.
Cross my heart,if you complete me.11:22 PM.
